Ofbau\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r? Er \u00fea\u00f0 \u00feessvegna sem \u00fe\u00fa l\u00e9st \u00feig hverfa? Fannst \u00fe\u00e9r \u00e9g ganga of langt? Well, I never promised\u00a0you a rose-garden. N\u00fa skal \u00e9g segja \u00fe\u00e9r d\u00e1l\u00edti\u00f0 og \u00fe\u00fa \u00e6ttir a\u00f0 lesa \u00feetta tvisvar og taka gl\u00f3sur, v\u00ed a\u00f0 l\u00edfi\u00f0 er ekki st\u00f3r, mj\u00fakur b\u00f3mullarhno\u00f0ri og \u00fe\u00fa g\u00e6tir or\u00f0i\u00f0 fyrir einhverju svipu\u00f0u aftur.<\/p>\n
\u00de\u00fa ert, minn k\u00e6ri, einhver yndislegasta mannvera sem \u00e9g hef kynnst. \u00de\u00f3tt \u00fe\u00fa s\u00e9rt ekki al\u00fa\u00f0legur \u00ed framkomu veit \u00e9g a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa ert k\u00e6rleiksr\u00edkur og hjartahl\u00fdr og \u00fea\u00f0 eru sjaldg\u00e6fir eiginleikar. \u00c9g veit \u00fea\u00f0 vegna \u00feess a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa talar um fj\u00f6lskyldu \u00fe\u00edna og vini af \u00f3venjulegri \u00e1st\u00fa\u00f0 og vir\u00f0ingu. \u00c9g kann a\u00f0 meta manng\u00e6skuna \u00ed \u00fe\u00e9r. Svo ertu l\u00edka skemmtilegur og \u00fea\u00f0 er b\u00f3nus.<\/p>\n
En \u00fe\u00fa ert hrokafullur, elskan m\u00edn. \u00de\u00fa veist a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa ert afbur\u00f0agreindur og \u00fe\u00fa heldur a\u00f0 \u00feessvegna s\u00e9rtu yfir anna\u00f0 f\u00f3lk hafinn. Allavega yfir \u00fe\u00e1 sem taka \u00e1kvar\u00f0anir sem \u00fe\u00e9r finnast \u00f3r\u00f6kr\u00e9ttar, \u00fe\u00e1 sem s\u00fdna \u00f6nnur vi\u00f0br\u00f6g\u00f0 en \u00fe\u00fa sj\u00e1lfur. En \u00fea\u00f0 er ekki svo.<\/p>\n
\u00de\u00fa ert falleg s\u00e1l. \u00de\u00fa ert g\u00f3\u00f0ur str\u00e1kur. \u00de\u00fa hefur pers\u00f3nut\u00f6fra og f\u00f3lk hr\u00edfst af \u00fe\u00e9r, ekki eins miki\u00f0 og \u00fe\u00fa heldur en j\u00faj\u00fa, \u00fea\u00f0 hr\u00edfst vissulega af \u00fe\u00e9r. \u00c9g hef t\u00f6luvert \u00e1lit \u00e1 \u00fe\u00e9r, meira \u00e1lit en flestir a\u00f0rir, en \u00e9g s\u00e9 l\u00edka alveg \u00feennan veikleika \u00feinn. Allir sj\u00e1 hann og hann er l\u00fdti \u00e1 \u00fe\u00e9r. \u00c9g s\u00e9 hann, og \u00e9g hef sam\u00fa\u00f0 me\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r vegna \u00feess a\u00f0 \u00e9g skil hann. \u00c9g skil hversvegna \u00fe\u00fa heldur a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa s\u00e9rt merkilegri en anna\u00f0 f\u00f3lk, svo merkilegur a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa telur \u00feig geta hunsa\u00f0 (sleppi d-inu af \u00e1st\u00e6\u00f0um sem eru \u00fe\u00e9r kunnar) f\u00f3lk sem kroppar \u00ed \u00feessa b\u00f3mullartilveru \u00fe\u00edna, f\u00f3lk eins og mig. \u00c9g skil vi\u00f0br\u00f6g\u00f0 \u00fe\u00edn en \u00e9g sam\u00feykki \u00feau ekki. \u00de\u00fa hunsa\u00f0ir mig \u00feegar \u00e9g tala\u00f0i til \u00fe\u00edn \u00ed fullri einl\u00e6gni. Og n\u00fa veistu a\u00f0 \u00e9g l\u00e6t ekki hunsa mig.<\/p>\n
\u00de\u00fa ert g\u00f3\u00f0ur str\u00e1kur og sj\u00e1lfsagt hefur\u00f0u haldi\u00f0 a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa v\u00e6rir a\u00f0 gera m\u00e9r grei\u00f0a me\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed. Kannski hefur\u00f0u \u00ed manng\u00e6sku \u00feinni, hugsa\u00f0 sem svo; „lofum stelpugreyinu a\u00f0 halda andlitinu“. En eins og \u00e9g sag\u00f0i \u00fe\u00e9r \u00fe\u00e1 hef \u00e9g ekkert andlit til a\u00f0 missa. \u00c9g \u00fearf ekki a\u00f0 halda h\u00f6f\u00f0i gagnvart neinum nema sj\u00e1lfri m\u00e9r. \u00c9g hef \u00feykkan skr\u00e1p og skerta blyg\u00f0unarkennd, \u00e9g sag\u00f0i \u00fea\u00f0 hreint \u00fat og ef \u00fe\u00fa hefur haldi\u00f0 a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 v\u00e6ri varnarbrag\u00f0, hefur\u00f0u vanmeti\u00f0 mig.<\/p>\n
\u00de\u00fa veist svosem a\u00f0 \u00e9g er ekki eins g\u00e1fu\u00f0 og \u00e9g l\u00edt \u00fat fyrir a\u00f0 vera en s\u00e1 sem opnar s\u00e1l s\u00edna er ekki endilega heimskur og \u00fea\u00f0 \u00fearf meira en tilviljanakenndan \u00e1tro\u00f0ning til a\u00f0 drepa fjallajurt me\u00f0 bl\u00e1 augu. \u00de\u00fa \u00feurftir ekki a\u00f0 \u00f3ttast a\u00f0 s\u00e6ra mig, og ef \u00fat \u00ed \u00fea\u00f0 er fari\u00f0, \u00fe\u00e1 kemstu ekki \u00ed gegnum l\u00edfi\u00f0 \u00e1n \u00feess a\u00f0 valda einhverjum vonbrig\u00f0um.<\/p>\n
-\u00de\u00fa hef\u00f0ir geta\u00f0 svara\u00f0 m\u00e9r me\u00f0 kurteislegu nei-\u00fev\u00ed-mi\u00f0ur-og-af-\u00fev\u00ed-a\u00f0-\u00e9g-kann-\u00e1-vissan-h\u00e1tt-vel-vi\u00f0-\u00feig-vertu-\u00fe\u00e1-svo-v\u00e6n-a\u00f0-l\u00e1ta-sem-ekkert-hafi-\u00ed-skorist. \u00c9g hef\u00f0i gert eins og \u00fe\u00fa ba\u00f0st.
\n-\u00de\u00fa hef\u00f0ir geta\u00f0 l\u00fdst hneykslun; Eva-\u00feetta-er-fullkomlega-\u00f3vi\u00f0eigandi-og-l\u00e1ttu-mig-\u00ed-svo-\u00ed-fri\u00f0i. \u00c9g hef\u00f0i sagt \u00fe\u00e9r a\u00f0 fleiri en k\u00f6tturinn fari s\u00ednar eigin lei\u00f0ir, og a\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed fari fjarri a\u00f0 allir sta\u00f0ir s\u00e9u m\u00e9r jafnk\u00e6rir. Svo hef\u00f0i \u00e9g kvatt kurteislega og l\u00e1ti\u00f0 \u00fear vi\u00f0 sitja.
\n-\u00de\u00fa hef\u00f0ir l\u00edka geta\u00f0 reytt af \u00fe\u00e9r b\u00f3mullina og ausi\u00f0 mig f\u00fakyr\u00f0um. \u00de\u00e1 hef\u00f0i \u00e9g svara\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r fullum h\u00e1lsi og s\u00e6rt \u00feig miklu d\u00fdpra s\u00e1ri en \u00fe\u00fa mig. Svo hef\u00f0i \u00fea\u00f0 jafna\u00f0 sig.
\n-\u00de\u00fa hef\u00f0ir m.a.s. geta\u00f0 gefi\u00f0 m\u00e9r s\u00e9ns. \u00de\u00fa hef\u00f0ir geta\u00f0 sagt; seg\u00f0u-\u00fea\u00f0-sem-\u00fe\u00fa-\u00fearft-a\u00f0-segja-en-ekki-koma-n\u00e6r-\u00fev\u00ed-m\u00e9r-l\u00edst-ekkert-\u00e1-\u00feetta-og-\u00e9g-vil-ekki-\u00feurfa-a\u00f0-bi\u00f0ja-\u00feig-a\u00f0-fara. \u00c9g hef\u00f0i fari\u00f0 varlega a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r og \u00fe\u00e9r hef\u00f0i or\u00f0i\u00f0 lj\u00f3st a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 tekur b\u00f3mullardreng meira en viku a\u00f0 l\u00e6ra a\u00f0 skilja manneskju sem er vaxin upp \u00ed hrj\u00f3stri.
\n-Jafnvel \u00feegar \u00fea\u00f0 rann upp fyrir \u00fe\u00e9r a\u00f0 \u00e9g \u00e6tla\u00f0i ekki a\u00f0 l\u00e1ta \u00feig komast upp me\u00f0 a\u00f0 hunsa mig, hef\u00f0ir\u00f0u geta\u00f0 skrifa\u00f0 m\u00e9r eina m\u00e1lsgrein; sorry-\u00e9g-\u00e1tti-ekki-a\u00f0-horfa-\u00ed-gegnum-\u00feig-en-m\u00e9r-finnst-\u00f3\u00fe\u00e6gilegt-a\u00f0-vera-minntur-\u00e1-\u00fea\u00f0,-vertu-svo-v\u00e6n-a\u00f0-h\u00e6tta-a\u00f0-kvelja-mig.<\/p>\n
\u00c9g hef\u00f0i h\u00e6tt. \u00c9g hef\u00f0i afm\u00e1\u00f0 \u00f6ll ummerki \u00feess a\u00f0 m\u00e9r s\u00e9 kunnugt um tilveru \u00fe\u00edna. \u00c9g hef\u00f0i sj\u00e1lfsagt spurt \u00f3\u00fe\u00e6gilegra spurninga, \u00fev\u00ed \u00fea\u00f0 er m\u00e9r e\u00f0lisl\u00e6gt, en \u00e9g hef\u00f0i aldrei krafi\u00f0 \u00feig svara um eitthva\u00f0 sem \u00fe\u00fa vildir ekki r\u00e6\u00f0a. \u00c9g er svo mann\u00fa\u00f0leg \u00ed grimmd minni.<\/p>\n
\u00dea\u00f0 eina sem \u00fe\u00fa hef\u00f0ir \u00feurft a\u00f0 gera, var a\u00f0 gefa m\u00e9r sta\u00f0festingu \u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa litir ekki \u00e1 mig sem sk\u00e1ldsagnapers\u00f3nu. \u00deegar sk\u00e1ldsagnapers\u00f3na truflar mann, r\u00e6\u00f0ur ma\u00f0ur sj\u00e1lfur hvort ma\u00f0ur lokar b\u00f3kinni e\u00f0a ekki en raunveruleikinn er ekki sk\u00e1ldsaga, hvorki l\u00e9leg s\u00e1pu\u00f3pera n\u00e9 b\u00f3kmenntalegt st\u00f3rvirki. Raunveruleikinn er h\u00e9r og n\u00fa og \u00fe\u00fa kemst ekki upp me\u00f0 a\u00f0 hunsa hann til lengdar. Og \u00fea\u00f0 skaltu vita minn k\u00e6ri a\u00f0 \u00e9g er \u00ed raun engin s\u00e1pu\u00f3pera, heldur raunveruleg, lifandi manneskja og \u00e9g l\u00e6t ekki hunsa mig \u00feegar \u00e9g hef ekkert til a\u00f0 skammast m\u00edn fyrir.<\/p>\n
Nei elskan, \u00e9g er ekki rei\u00f0. Ef \u00e9g v\u00e6ri rei\u00f0 hef\u00f0i \u00e9g sagt \u00fea\u00f0. \u00c9g kem til dyranna eins og \u00e9g er kl\u00e6dd, meina \u00fea\u00f0 sem \u00e9g segi og segi \u00fea\u00f0 sem \u00e9g meina. (Nema au\u00f0vita\u00f0 \u00feegar \u00e9g er \u00ed \u00e1kve\u00f0nu hlutverki en \u00fe\u00e1 kynni \u00e9g \u00fea\u00f0 s\u00e9rstaklega fyrir \u00e1horfendum.) Hei\u00f0arleiki gerir l\u00edfi\u00f0 nefnilega betra. Ekki endilega \u00fe\u00e6gilegra en Jes\u00fas var enginn vitleysingur og hann hitti naglann \u00e1 h\u00f6fu\u00f0i\u00f0 \u00feegar hann sag\u00f0i „sannleikurinn mun gj\u00f6ra y\u00f0ur frj\u00e1lsa“. S\u00e1 sem horfist \u00ed augu vi\u00f0 sj\u00e1lfan sig og veruleikann er frj\u00e1ls. Frj\u00e1ls fr\u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 blyg\u00f0ast s\u00edn fyrir a\u00f0 vera \u00fea\u00f0 sem hann er, einnig \u00feegar honum l\u00edkar ekki s\u00e9rlega vel vi\u00f0 sj\u00e1lfan sig. Til lengdar er \u00fea\u00f0 betra.<\/p>\n
Er ekki d\u00e1l\u00edti\u00f0 skr\u00fdti\u00f0 a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r skuli l\u00ed\u00f0a svona? A\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa skulir blyg\u00f0ast \u00fe\u00edn fyrir \u00fea\u00f0 sem \u00e9g er, \u00feegar \u00e9g geri \u00fea\u00f0 ekki sj\u00e1lf? \u00de\u00fa \u00fearft ekki a\u00f0 blyg\u00f0ast \u00fe\u00edn fyrir \u00e1huga minn \u00e1 \u00fe\u00e9r. E\u00f0a fyrir vi\u00f0br\u00f6g\u00f0 m\u00edn vi\u00f0 vi\u00f0br\u00f6g\u00f0um \u00fe\u00ednum. \u00de\u00fa hl\u00fdtur a\u00f0 sj\u00e1 a\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 er algj\u00f6rlega \u00fat \u00ed h\u00f6tt. En \u00fe\u00fa gerir \u00fea\u00f0 samt af \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r l\u00edkar ekki s\u00e9rlega vel vi\u00f0 sj\u00e1lfan \u00feig \u00feessa stundina. \u00c9g er ekki eins h\u00e6ttuleg og \u00fe\u00fa heldur. \u00de\u00fa getur enn\u00fe\u00e1 broti\u00f0 odd af ofl\u00e6ti \u00fe\u00ednu og skrifa\u00f0 m\u00e9r. Enginn skilur hrokann \u00ed \u00fe\u00e9r betur en \u00e9g. \u00dea\u00f0 er ekki \u00fear me\u00f0 sagt a\u00f0 \u00e9g sam\u00feykki hann en \u00e9g skil \u00feig betur en \u00fe\u00fa heldur. Ef \u00fe\u00fa hefur samband geri \u00e9g \u00fea\u00f0 sem \u00fe\u00fa bi\u00f0ur um. \u00dea\u00f0 eina sem \u00fe\u00fa \u00fearft a\u00f0 gera er a\u00f0 s\u00fdna ofurlitla au\u00f0m\u00fdkt og gefa m\u00e9r sta\u00f0festingu \u00e1 \u00fev\u00ed a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa hafir lesi\u00f0 \u00feetta og teki\u00f0 \u00fea\u00f0 til \u00fe\u00edn.<\/p>\n
\u00de\u00fa \u00e6ttir sj\u00e1lfs \u00fe\u00edn vegna a\u00f0 hafa samband og bi\u00f0ja mig \u00ed fullri vinsemd a\u00f0 s\u00fdna \u00fe\u00e9r meiri tillitsemi en \u00fe\u00fa hefur s\u00fdnt m\u00e9r en m\u00edn vegna \u00fearftu ekki a\u00f0 gera nokkurn skapa\u00f0an hlut. \u00c9g \u00fearfnast \u00feess ekki lengur. \u00c9g er b\u00fain a\u00f0 s\u00fdna \u00fe\u00e9r a\u00f0 \u00e9g l\u00e6t ekki hunsa mig og \u00fear er m\u00e9r n\u00f3g. Au\u00f0vita\u00f0 getur\u00f0u hafna\u00f0 m\u00e9r og ef \u00fe\u00fa v\u00e6rir ekki svona vel upp alinn g\u00e6tir\u00f0u jafnvel reitt mig til rei\u00f0i, ni\u00f0url\u00e6gt mig, s\u00e6rt mig, broti\u00f0 mig ni\u00f0ur (\u00e9g er nefnilega broth\u00e6ttari en \u00e9g l\u00edt \u00fat fyrir a\u00f0 vera) en \u00e9g hef greinilega n\u00e1\u00f0 \u00fev\u00ed markmi\u00f0i a\u00f0 gera \u00fe\u00e9r lj\u00f3st a\u00f0 \u00fe\u00fa kemst ekki upp me\u00f0 a\u00f0 hunsa mig.<\/p>\n
H\u00e9\u00f0an af gleymir\u00f0u m\u00e9r aldrei.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Ofbau\u00f0 \u00fe\u00e9r? Er \u00fea\u00f0 \u00feessvegna sem \u00fe\u00fa l\u00e9st \u00feig hverfa? Fannst \u00fe\u00e9r \u00e9g ganga of langt? Well, I never promised\u00a0you a rose-garden. N\u00fa skal \u00e9g segja \u00fe\u00e9r d\u00e1l\u00edti\u00f0 og \u00fe\u00fa \u00e6ttir a\u00f0 lesa \u00feetta tvisvar og taka gl\u00f3sur, v\u00ed a\u00f0 … Halda \u00e1fram a\u00f0 lesa